Tuesday, October 26, 2010

What was missing from "The Secret"

Like many people, I read "The Secret" by Rhonda Bryne. After all, who wouldn't want to attract more of the good things into their life? But I always thought that something in its explanation of the law of attraction was missing. A tiny voice inside of me kept saying "It couldn't be that easy".

What I have discovered in the years since I read the book is that, yes, something very important was missing from the book and yes, it can be that easy. What was missing, you ask? I found that nowhere in the book did it mention that you have to firmly believe, totally and absolutely, that what you want to bring into your life will happen for the law to work. It is more than just being able to picture yourself in that great relationship with the mate of your dreams or spending money with great abandon or to ask the universe for it. It requires knowing with your heart and soul that it WILL happen and, perhaps more importantly, that you are worthy of it. Then, and only then, will you begin to attract what you want into your life.

Let me give you a personal example of what I mean. When I first decided to leave my last position and to go out on my own, I knew that I would need to find a part-time job to help me along, at least for the first year or so. I felt that the extra money, and people contact that a part-time job would provide would help make the transition a bit easier. My search was not easy, as previous blogs will tell you. After over 40 applications, I had received only two calls, and both of those jobs didn't work out. To say I was getting discouraged is an understatement. Then, one Saturday in late July, I saw a tiny ad in the paper. It was for a "mature, friendly individual" to work in a bird and garden store. And instead of sending in a resume, I was asked to call if I wanted to apply. I liked that, and it sounded interesting, so I called and spoke to the owner of the store. She told me a lot about the job and answered any questions I had. After I got off the phone, I knew that the job sounded just right for me...most of the women who work there are around my age and had been there for years (an indication to me that it was a good place to work) and I would be working 2-3 full days a week, again something that I had been hoping for. It just felt right somehow. I dropped in a resume the next day and got to meet the owner. Again, it felt right and I remember driving away from the store thinking "this job is mine". It is hard to describe but I just knew that that job was mine. To help matters along a bit, I also made up an affirmation, just to keep that definite feeling. I said my affirmation outloud every chance I got. And I got the job! In the three months since then I still love going to work there.

Call it confidence, self-assurance or fate, who knows, but I strongly believe that it was my strong belief that the job was perfect for me and would be mine that helped to attract it into my life. And this is just one example of this happening. I can tell you about others but I don't want to bore you. But each time I have felt this way about something, that "thing" has been attracted into my life.

Think back through your own life to a time when you felt absolutely sure that something was meant for you or that something would happen. It could have been a job, a new car, a dream vacation or a relationship to name just a few things. Did it happen? Chances are, it did. Holding this strong a belief not only sends very strong messages out into the universe but also shows that you are ready to receive what is sent back to you. Plus, you are also willing to "help" the process along by doing what needs to be done to make it a reality. The Law of Attraction is more than just asking for something and waiting for it to come; it requires some effort on our part. And that effort starts with faith.

I'll write more about how you can attract abundance and prosperity into your life over the next few blogs. See you again soon!

Monday, October 4, 2010

You're Making the Biggest Mistake of Your Life

"You're making the biggest mistake of your life?" I read this line in a book recently and it got me thinking about making mistakes and failure. I'm sure you can relate when I say that we have all made mistakes at one time or another in our lives. Some of them were fairly small (do you really remember what questions you answered incorrectly on that math test in grade 3?) and some of them have been huge (why did I fall in love with that guy anyway??? What was I THINKING?) but if you are like me, you survived them all. Or at least your body survived them, but how about your spirit?

We were taught as children that making mistakes is something bad. We were all encouraged to strive for perfection and punished for every red mark on a test or assignment. On the job, many of us have found that it is often easier to maintain the status quo instead of taking a risk and doing something different, because the threat of being reprimanded, receiving a negative performance review, or losing your job just isn't worth it. And the result is a lack of creativity and innovation in our lives, and a diminishing of our spirit.

There is another way of looking at mistakes. That is that each mistake isn't a failure of us to do something right, but is an opportunity to learn from each one and to grow as a result. Each mistake we make is a chance for us to learn something new about life and ourselves. If a relationship doesn't work, we learn what characteristics we like and don't like to see in others, and we learn what we can do next time to make our relationships better. If we try out a new idea on the job and it doesn't work, it is OK. We take a closer look at what we did, and make the changes that are necessary to make sure we don't get the same result the next time. With each mistake comes an increase in self-confidence and the urge to innovate - to create our own futures. Isn't this better than feeling guilty because you think you failed?

Looking back on my life I can think of several times I didn't do something because I was scared that it would be "the biggest mistake of my life". There have been a couple of people in my life who have told me that I am making a big mistake by leaving my job and starting a coaching business on my own. What is inferred in this is that if I fail - if my business doesn't work out - than I will have ruined my life...that my life will never recover. But I choose to look at it another way. What would my life be like if I DIDN't take that risk? As the key character, Samantha Sweeting, discovers in the book "The Undomestic Goddess":

"If I've learned one lesson from all that's happened to me, it's that there IS no such thing as the biggest mistake of your existence. There's no such thing as ruining your life. Life's a pretty resilient thing, it turns out."

My life will not end if things don't work out. In fact, my life will probably be richer just for having tried. But I prefer to think that of course I will succeed. What is to stop me? Only my thoughts and attitude can truly keep me from achieving what I want to achieve, and I will definitely make lots of mistakes along the way!

What have you been putting off doing in your life because you were scared that it would be "the biggest mistake of my life"? Do something today that will move you towards doing it, without the fear of making a mistake. Also, to help give you the motivation to move, watch the following video. I guarantee it will help!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tjYoKCBYag